Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
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