It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
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