yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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