Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Randomize
