Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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