shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
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