He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize