i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Randomize