This show inspires me to have sex in space
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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