butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
then he tried to convert me to islam
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
Randomize
