Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize