We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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