haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.