He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Randomize
