Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize