season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
We have started to decorate penises.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
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