hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
Operation Purity has been aborted
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
