okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
Randomize
