I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
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