But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize
