Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
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