Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize
