Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
27 People Confess The Worst Jobs They’ve Ever Had
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
25 People Confess Their Terrifying Stalker Stories
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.