Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(530): View more from California

How is Miami?

(954): View more from Florida

Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln

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(804): View more from Virginia

I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.

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(201): View more from New Jersey

I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.

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(301): View more from Maryland

dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow

(410): View more from Maryland

so basically your not goin out tonight?

(301): View more from Maryland

who said that?

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(604): View more from British Columbia

the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.

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(443): View more from Maryland

I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.

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(406): View more from Montana

apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...

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(540): View more from Virginia

It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.

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(406): View more from Montana

I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.

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