How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize
