I don't remember. Are we still dating?
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
Randomize
