i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
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