girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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