I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize