Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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