Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
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I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
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