??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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