How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
I need to stop coming to work sober
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
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