i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
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