Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize
