Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
you were so drunk you tried to use the microwave as a calculator for your BAC
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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