I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
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