It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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