This girl is more easily done than said...
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
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