Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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