Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
Man, jail baloney is awful.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
