Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
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