respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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