you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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