Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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