dude, the building's fire alarm was going off for over an hour last night and you didn't move
that's ok, when I'm passed out drunk I'm impervious to flame
I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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