Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (330): cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank. http://tfl.nu/47xc
  Replies (8) Good night (1804) Bad night (589)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (425): i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant http://tfl.nu/up0m
  Replies (54) Good night (5042) Bad night (1642)
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (619): If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library. http://tfl.nu/gs64
  Replies (59) Good night (1016) Bad night (3726)
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  My Vagina smells like Nemo again.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (651): My Vagina smells like Nemo again. http://tfl.nu/j13v
  Replies (29) Good night (600) Bad night (5250)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (540): Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right http://tfl.nu/yhhf
  Replies (38) Good night (5001) Bad night (1034)
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (508): dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day http://tfl.nu/82u7
  Replies (10) Good night (5293) Bad night (740)
• Favorite

  (850): View more from Florida

  I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (850): I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think. http://tfl.nu/r53a
  Replies (7) Good night (1193) Bad night (2724)
• Favorite

  (785): View more from Kansas

  Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (785): Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night http://tfl.nu/utdq
  Replies (1) Good night (2230) Bad night (820)
• Favorite

  (270): View more from Kentucky

  I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.

  (1-270): View more from Kentucky

  I miss high conversations.

  (270): View more from Kentucky

  Swinging. Is. Amazing.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (270): I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high. (1-270): I miss high conversations. (270): Swinging. Is. Amazing. http://tfl.nu/qk9i
  Replies (5) Good night (2280) Bad night (1369)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (847): Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight http://tfl.nu/9jn8
  Replies (2) Good night (1946) Bad night (609)
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (724): Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression. http://tfl.nu/uaau
  Replies (9) Good night (516) Bad night (1288)
• Favorite

  (770): View more from Georgia

  Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (770): Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this. http://tfl.nu/8f5s
  Replies (3) Good night (1021) Bad night (444)
• Favorite

  (740): View more from Ohio

  do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (740): do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment. http://tfl.nu/04bg
  Replies (12) Good night (2329) Bad night (1140)
• Favorite

  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (918): I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care http://tfl.nu/shwc
  Replies (1) Good night (1353) Bad night (347)
• Favorite

  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club

  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (902): We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club (902): The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists http://tfl.nu/vl5e
  Replies (5) Good night (1145) Bad night (330)

Randomize