Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
this boner is exhausting
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
