We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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