I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
Holy shit dude........stairs
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
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