I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
im on a boat
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