He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
